Caroline and the Argument
by Caroline
Summary: An argument stemming from Richard's mugging causes the mutual attraction between C&R to come to the surface, causing them to have an affair... lots of angst follows as they struggle with confusion and mixed signals between them...


CAROLINE AND THE ARGUMENT ****

CAROLINE AND THE ARGUMENT

By: [Caroline][1]

And: [Jana][2]

"Richard, every time we have a disagreement you can't walk away mad!" she exclaimed, planting her hands on her hips.

He brushed past her, making his way to the door. "Or what, you'll hit me over the head with a rolled up newspaper?"

Her eyes widened in fury, and she strode toward him, her hands clenched into fists. "You know, I didn't think you were a coward before but if you just walk away you might be!"

Richard stood in the doorway facing the elevator, Caroline staring at his back. He hung his head and turned around to face her, his voice softening. "Look, Caroline..." He paused... "For my birthday when I was ten, I got a leather bomber jacket." He smiled at the memory. "I loved that jacket, I really did..." He looked up at her again. "But then one day after school on the playground, Kurt Gustinger... who by the way is now an alcoholic prison guard... took it from me, he just.... stole it. And I, for some reason... didn't fight back. And losing the jacket was bad enough, but what made it worse was... my sister was there."

Caroline hung her head, regretful that she'd raised her voice to him. He continued to speak softly, gazing at her head as her gaze remained directed to the floor. "...She saw the whole thing, and... she had this look of... complete disappointment on her face."

Caroline felt the tears well up in her eyes, and fought to blink them back. She looked up at Richard as he sighed... "You had that same look on your face today."

Struggling to keep her composure, she attempted to choke out an apology. "Richard, I'm--"

He held up a hand to stop her. "No, it's okay." He turned toward the elevator... "I should go now."

"But, Richard--"

The door swung shut behind him, leaving Caroline in tears. She held her face in her hands and began to cry, feeling rotten for even starting the argument in the first place. She should've known something from his past caused his earlier behavior... his earlier cowardice.

Richard was only downstairs a moment before returning to the elevator... returning to her apartment. He strode over to the door...

Caroline realized she couldn't let him leave like that.... upset. She strode over to the door and flung it open on the way to go catch him... at the same time Richard was about to knock, his fist poised at the ready. They stood inches apart... staring... momentarily confused by the other's actions. Caroline wiped furiously at her tears. "Richard..." she choked out... more of a whisper, really.

His eyes softened when he saw her crying. "Why--?" His question dropped, confused by her emotional state. "Caroline? Why are you crying?"

She couldn't give him an answer... she didn't even really know, herself. His pain made her sad, the tears just followed. When she said nothing, he became concerned. He took a step closer, if that were even possible. "Oh, God..." he whispered, reaching out to wipe the tears from her cheeks in an attempt to ease her obvious distress. "I couldn't leave..." he whispered.

He cupped her face in his hands and drew her closer, wiping off her tear-stained cheeks. "I couldn't leave like that," he whispered, "I couldn't leave you in tears..."

She sniffled and placed her hands over his as he gently cupped her face. She briefly wondered why Del couldn't be this sweet to her... this caring. Her expression showed seriousness... mixed with a little guilt. "Richard, I'm so sorry," she whispered tearfully. "I had no idea..."

"Sshh... don't--" He choked on his words... "Don't be sorry. It's okay..." he assured her, his eyes starting to tear up. "Caroline, you've just gotta understand... we come from different worlds... you grew up in the Midwest--you had a semi-decent, Norman Rockwell kind of family and childhood..." His voice began to tremble as he held her face in his hands, her delicate hands over his. "I grew up in a family where nobody cared about me.... nobody at all. Nothing ever went right for me, and--"

Caroline cut him off by leaning in quickly and placing her lips to his, the consequences of such an action far from her mind. When she felt him tense up, she immediately regretted her actions and pulled away.

"What did you kiss me for?" he asked as he stared at her in disbelief.

She shrugged... "I wanted to."

He looked at her expectantly. "Why?"

She became flustered and searched her mind for an answer. She hadn't planned on having to explain herself, hadn't planned on kissing him, hadn't planned on feeling like this... "I don't know..." she whispered, turning away from him.

"Now who's walking away?" he stated firmly, causing her to turn around.

"What?"

"It was a simple question, Caroline... why did you kiss me?"

"I just wanted to..." was the most rational answer she could think of.

"Out of pity? I don't need your pi--"

"No, Richard..." she interrupted... "Not out of pity. Out of need."

"Need?" he repeated. 

"Yes, need. I needed to kiss you."

"What do you mean you needed to kiss me?"

"I felt the need to kiss you, so I kissed you!" She began slowly walking back to him, and he was slowly closing the gap.

"Do you always act on your needs like that? Impulsively?"

"No..." she admitted... "But I think it's about time I did." She was now as close to him as toe-to-toe... "I think it's about time we both did."

Looking into her eyes as his palms once again framed her face, he pulled her lips to his, this time being the one to initiate the kiss. A wave of intense longing suddenly rippled through his body, and he pulled her fiercely against him, his hands still framing her face. Surprised, her hands flew away from his to rest on his waist, pulling him closer. Their kiss became intense and heated through their attempts to kiss away the other's tears, the other's pain. The kiss soon became more than one of simple need, and turned into one of longing, desire... electricity. The mutual attraction between them could be denied no more.

Why else could they have gotten into such a heated argument over something so silly? There was no other reason than sexual tension. Their hands alternated positions on the other's body, Richard's hands moving to Caroline's hips while her hands found their way to his head, the kiss continuing to escalate.

Richard's fingers dug into her hips as he swung her around and pinned her against the door, kissing her so hungrily he nearly devoured her mouth. She moaned into his mouth and pulled his head closer to hers, a signal that she still wanted more. She began to pull him toward the stairs, and he knew exactly what she meant.

When they entered her bedroom, they began tearing at each other's clothes, tumbling into bed and making love so passionately and intensely, it nearly made Caroline scream.

Afterwards, they lay side-by-side in bed, exhausted, their lovemaking equalling the workout of an Olympic decathlon. Silent while they listened to their breathing slow, they held hands as they stared up at the ceiling.

__

What just happened? Caroline asked herself silently... deep in thought. They had jumped into bed rather quickly... quicker than Annie. Well, maybe not quicker than Annie, but quicker than Caroline had ever before. Question was... why? Could it have been the heat of the argument?

She thought back to moments before... to the passion she and Richard had just shared. Richard was so attentive, caring, caressing every inch of her body with an intensity she'd never before experienced from any other man... not even Del. She used to consider Del the best lover she'd ever been with... not anymore.

What had just occurred would far surpass what most would call 'mind-shattering sex'. This went beyond the term 'sex'... it was by far the most intense sexual experience of her life... almost as if they were connected not just by body... but by soul. Soulmates?

Richard remained perfectly still, deep in thought as he subconsciously listened to Caroline's breathing... _What just happened?_ his brain asked him, half ridiculing him for his behavior... _You're a bigger slut than Annie!_ he scolded himself, then scoffed silently... _No one is a bigger slut than Annie..._ he decided... _But still... how could you do this to Caroline? _Better question was... why did he do it? The heightened emotions due to the intense argument perhaps?

Of course, the reason for the intensity of the argument in the first place was because of the sexual tension that had been building between them since he first started working for her. Their mutual attraction couldn't be denied anymore... in the heat of the moment... but could it be denied now? In the light of what had just happened between them?

"Caroline..." he whispered, grabbing her attention...

"What?" she asked nervously.

He let go of her hand and slowly sat up, making sure the blanket was still strategically placed around himself... "I think we need to talk... about this."

She sighed, clutching the sheet to her collarbone as she sat up. "Yeah, I think we do too." She paused, trying to gather her thoughts. "Look... Richard..."

"This was such a mistake," he sighed sadly.

She looked up at him, her expression hurt. "What?"

"This was a mistake..." he repeated.

"A mistake?"

"Well, yeah. You're with Del..." he reasoned, "And we're..." he trailed off, trying to decide how to put his thoughts into words. What he wanted to say was: 'I want you to leave Del. I wanna be more than your colorist' ...but what came out instead was... "You're my employer."

Caroline blinked back her tears as she realized what his words were saying. He thought of her as nothing more than his annoying employer... "Right." she agreed, not wanting to make a further fool of herself. _God, what must he be thinking? He must think I'm a slut and a cheat!_

"Right." Richard repeated... "So, maybe it's best if we just never talk about this again..."

Never talk about it again... how could she do that? It was the most incredible experience... of both body and mind... and she's supposed to just dismiss it? How could he have not felt it too?

"Fine," she agreed, her tone sounding a cross between sad and angry.

"Are you ok?" he asked, picking up on her off tone.

"Yes," she answered simply... "Excuse me..."

She gathered the sheet around herself and ran into the bathroom. By the time she came back out, he was gone. 

Richard walked through the door of his apartment and dropped heavily to the mattress. What had he done? He just ruined everything. He'd slept with Caroline... the woman his heart belonged to since the moment he'd met her. But her heart belonged to Del... or if not her heart, at least her body. He'd had no right to take her... love her... become one with her. Now their friendship and professional relationship would be permanently affected. 

__

Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! he berated himself... how would he ever be able to face her again? Things would surely be awkward between them now... would she fire him? How would he act around her? How could he go back to acting like she was no more than an employer after the connection they'd just made? How could he pretend it meant nothing when it meant everything? Did she not feel it? She couldn't have felt it... if she had, she would have asked him to stay. She was his 'sincere amore'... he was sure of that now. He'd always felt it... but now he was certain... only now, he'd driven her away by his impetuousness.

Caroline immediately realized Richard was gone when she came out of the bathroom. It was like she could sense his presence... they seemed that in-tuned to one-another. She meandered down the stairs and looked absently around as she walked into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of water. What was going to happen now? She had no idea. How was she going to be able to work next to him with these feelings, raw at the surface of her mind and heart? He couldn't be feeling the same way... he wouldn't have called their passionate act a mistake if he felt the same. From the moment Richard had pretended to be her date at Remo's on his first day of work, she knew there was something there. A connection of some kind that interweaved them together somehow. Now, what might have happened will never be known... because of her lack of restraint.

Richard paced outside Caroline's apartment, nervous to go in... nervous to face her. He told himself all the way over that he could do it... he could be in the same room with her and ignore his feelings. Now, faced with the idea of seeing her momentarily, he wasn't so sure.

Annie's abrupt entrance into the hall from her apartment startled Richard, and he stopped pacing to glare at her... "Hey, Richie! What are you up to?"

"Nothing!" he answered defensively. "What makes you think I'm up to something?"

Annie looked at him skeptically for a moment, a slight smirk on her face... "It's just a standard greeting Richie... relax."

"I am relaxed!" he replied anxiously.

"Yeah..." she chuckled... "You seem it." She opened the door to Caroline's loft, giving Richard no more time to hide and fret.

He walked in and scanned nonchalantly for Caroline before hanging up his coat."Caroline?" Annie called out... "Want me to make coffee?"

"Yeah!" Caroline's voice called back from upstairs... "Be right down!"

"So, Richie, feeling any better about yesterday?"

"Yesterday?" he repeated nervously... "Nothing happened yesterday! What are you talking about?!"

"Ummm... the mugging? I'm talking about the mugging..."

"Oh," he sighed with relief.

"Why? What did _you_ think I was talking about?"

"Nothing!" he snapped, dropping art supplies to the floor as he swung his portfolio onto the table.

Annie applauded at his mishap as he cleaned up the mess. "What's going on?" Caroline asked as she decended the stairs.

"Richie was just entertaining me by being a clutz." Annie quipped.

"Don't you have someone you could be sleeping with right now?" he asked bitterly.

"Why? Jealous?"

"Hardly. Just need to synchronize your date with the vet to get deloused..."

"Bite me!"

"Bite yourself! Better yet, bite off more than you can chew and go choke!"

"Hmmm... Richie is a bit more bitter than usual..." Annie arched her eyebrow... "I wonder why..."

Caroline and Richard exchanged looks as Annie gathered her mooched coffee and cereal..."Well, no time for that... plus, I don't care!" Annie informed... "So, I'm off..."

"Yes you are..." he quipped as she headed for the door, only turning around briefly to glare before leaving Caroline and Richard alone.

They just stared at each other, both unsure what to do next. Finally, Richard broke the uncomfortable silence..."Well... ummm... what did you want me to start on?"

Caroline blinked in confusion for a moment, then, realizing what he meant, snapped out of her daze... "Right! Ummm..." she gathered some panels together... "These..." she informed, handing them over to him.

He took them abruptly... "Fine."

The tension was thick between them, and neither was brave enough to broach the reason why. The day drug on with little said, but the looks between them spoke volumes. Both were upset... angry... and getting angrier...

__

How can he act as if nothing happened? How can he just sit there like it's just another day? Caroline tormented herself with questions... _Because it meant nothing to him... that's why._

She hates me. I seduced her and she cheated on Del and she hates me for it. Richard's thoughts ridiculed him... _She blames me. She has every right to. God, what was I thinking? That she'd profess her love for me and leave Del? God I'm pathetic._

Caroline peeked over Richard's shoulder as he worked... her light perfume mixed with coconut shampoo driving him to distraction... "What are you doing?" he asked, his voice slightly off.

"Checking your work." she replied.

"I don't need you hovering over me Caroline. I'm perfectly capable of coloring your little cartoon strip." He hadn't meant it how it sounded... but it was too late for that.

"Well, excuse me Richard! I am so sorry if my 'little cartoon strip' is so unchallenging for 'your highness, the great and mighty artist'!" she barked, moving away from him to more-so face him... "I know this is just a job to you... but it means something to me!"

"I never said it was just a job!" he snapped back.

"You didn't have to! Your attitude towards working here has shown through perfectly clear! If you hate it so much, why stay?!"

He stayed cause he couldn't imagine his life without her in it... but he couldn't say that. "I hate looking for new jobs..." he replied without emotion... "I could get stuck with a worse job than this one!"

"Ok... let me make this easier on all of us!" Caroline snapped... "You're fired!"

"What?!"

"You heard me! You're fired! Get out!"

"Caroline, you can't be serious!"

"Don't tell me what to feel! Or how to act! Or what to do!"

"What?! I never did any of those things!"

"You told me to forget about yesterday!"

"Is that what this is about? What happened yesterday?!"

"Oh, NOW you wanna talk about yesterday!?" Caroline was yelling at this point... "Ok! Let's talk! How can you act like nothing happened?!"

"What?! Caroline, what are you talking about?"

"Yesterday! You and me! In the sheets! Don't tell me you already forgot! Tell me, was I just a notch on your bedpost?"

"Caroline, you've got it all wrong..."

"No! It's YOU who has it all wrong! It's YOU who called it a mistake! It's YOU who said we should never talk about it! And it's YOU who's gonna be looking for a new job now!"

Just then Annie walked through the door, having heard all the yelling from across the hall... "What the hell is going on in here?" she asked, getting no response... "Caroline?"

"It's nothing!" Caroline snipped at Annie, continuing to glare at Richard... 

"It's not nothing!" Annie snipped back...

"Go home Annie!" Richard barked...

"Not till I get some answers!" Annie stood firm... "You know, if I didn't know any better, I'd swear you two were having a lover's spat!"

Caroline and Richard both looked to Annie abruptly, their expressions telling Annie everything...

"Whoa! You two... did it?!"

Richard rolled his eyes in disgust and Caroline glimpsed quick at his reaction before turning back to Annie... "Go home Annie!" Caroline ordered...

"Yeah. Right. Ok... I think I'll go home. Maybe puke a little..." she was mostly talking to herself... "Yeah, definitely feeling the urge to purge."

"Like I get every time she's in the room..." Richard quipped...

"Like I want to do right now looking at YOU!" Caroline shot back... "You make me sick Richard! I thought you were different! You with your 'sincere amore' talk! What, was that just bullshit?!"

"Of course not! What is wrong with you?"

"YOU! You are what's wrong with me! Ever since I hired you, you've been in my brain and in my heart... and now you are in my soul! And if you can sit there like yesterday meant nothing..." she trailed off...

Richard was in shock. He'd never seen Caroline so upset. And what was she trying to say? He wasn't sure. One thing was perfectly clear though... she was upset about yesterday. He didn't blame her... he figured she would be... but what she was saying... yelling at him... it didn't seem to be coinciding with what he thought she'd be mad about. It almost seemed as if she was upset NOT because he made love to her, but because he acted as if it meant nothing to him. How could she think that? It meant everything to him! Surely she knew that! Surely she sensed it in his touch. How could she not? He wanted to ask her... he wanted her to calm down and clearly explain what she was so angry about, but he didn't have the guts to ask her outright...

"Caroline, I don't think you understand..."

"I understand Richard... and I want you out!"

"But, Caroline--"

"OUT!" she interrupted, yelling and pointing at the door.

Richard didn't want to leave, but seeing her so upset... he thought it would be better if he left. He grabbed his portfolio and with head hung low, snatched his coat off the hook and left, taking the stairs instead of the elevator. 

Caroline collapsed on the couch in tears... shaking from anger and a sense of loss. She'd been wrong... she couldn't work with him anymore. Not after all they'd been through. Not after being in his arms, being loved and caressed, to being at a distance again. She ignored everything... the phone... the door... her hunger pangs... Salty's meow for canned food... everything. She ended up dozing off on the couch as her tears stained the throw pillow her face was buried in. It wasn't until much later... when she heard keys in the lock that she got up.

She jumped from the couch at the sound of her door being unlocked, disoriented at first, a severe headache from her actions quickly following. She stared at the door, unsure if she should lend a hand to whoever was attempting entry. When the door finally swung open, Caroline's heart leapt in her chest. It was Richard... his expression sad, his eyes puffy... had he been crying? He stared at Caroline, making no attempt to enter the loft. She had been crying... he could tell. He wanted to kiss away her tears... her pain... her anger. When she made a slight move towards him, he in turn moved towards her. Soon, they were moving quickly to one-another. 

Richard grabbed her into his arms, holding her tight to him... needing to feel her against him... "I'm so sorry Caroline. I was closed off... I didn't realize what you were trying to tell me..." he choked out, his voice odd but familiar at the same time. "I thought you were mad at me because I made love to you..."

"I wasn't mad cause you made love to me..." Caroline clarified... "I was mad cause you acted like it meant nothing!"

"It meant everything Caroline! Everything! _You_ mean everything..."

She burst into tears, and he pulled her closer (if that were even possible) as he wiped at her tears.... "I love you."

And he kissed her.... passionately... like there was no tomorrow. Caroline, while lost in the kiss, lost in his arms, which were tightening around her more and more by the second... choked down her sobs.

They headed for the bedroom without stopping... without even breaking their kiss. Once again, their longing for one another took control, and they tore at each other's clothes, tumbling into bed. His kisses were fervent over all of her body, bringing her desire to a frenzied state as she grasped at him... having to touch him everywhere she could. His touch spoke of how much he wanted her, and that knowledge made Caroline's mind reel. She wanted him too... desperately. He kissed her lips with passion... with a burning need to be one with her... but slowly, the kiss became softer... tender. His touch became softer too, and she melted into the pace he was setting, following his lead...

"I want tonight to last..." he whispered in her ear and he licked his way around its contours... "I want to love you for hours..."

She whimpered her approval, her head spinning from his touch and attention. He smiled slightly before moving to her neck, kissing his way to her shoulder, then travelling lower. She raked a hand through his hair, encouraging him...

His touches were like feathers, his kisses like drops of warm rain... and his attention to her needs was mind-shattering. This time it was not passion fueled by a heated argument, but affection and desire brought on by love and respect. True to his word, Richard touched her for hours, adoring her with every part of himself... completing her as they made love. They collapsed together in delirious exhaustion as the sun first began to rise... letting sleep take them away from one-another for a while, but only in conscious thought.

Hours later Caroline stirred, as if she could feel someone looking at her. She opened one eye and stared up at Richard, a soft giggle escaping before she could stop it... "What?"

A smile previously unseen by anyone lit up his face, and he leaned down to kiss her. "Good morning."

"Mmm..." she purred as she stretched and wrapped her arms around him in a hug... "Good morning." She pulled slightly away from him, her fingertips tracing his eyebrows and lightly gliding over his eyelashes. He closed his eyes at her touch... "Richard, last night was... incredible."

He grinned, glancing down at their feet, which were twined together, sticking out of the sheets, and caressed her leg with his... "I thought so too."

She sighed as she ran her fingers through his hair, receiving the same treatment from him. "I love you so much," she whispered.

"I love you too." He leaned over her again, lightly brushing his lips to hers. Pulling away, he gazed into her eyes for a moment before speaking softly... "Caroline, I want you to know..." He paused. "The other night... when I said it was a mistake... I didn't mean it. You have to know that. I only said it because I thought it was what you wanted to hear. I thought you didn't feel what I felt when we made love... I thought you never could. The connection we made..."

"I felt it too, Richard..." she confirmed. "I wanted to ask you to stay so badly, but... I was afraid."

"Afraid? Of what?"

"Of what you must think of me... I was worried that you saw me as a slut... and a cheat. That I had seduced you to sate my urges, or something..."

"No, Caroline! I didn't think that for even one second!" he insisted. "I thought you were mad at _me_ for seducing _you_... I thought that you hated me because of what we did... because of Del..."

"But Del and I weren't really back together..." she clarified. "Del wasn't even an issue... in my mind. The only reason I was upset yesterday was because you acted like it meant nothing to you... you acted like I was just another body through the turnstile.... I thought I was nothing special... that I was the only one who felt such a strong connection..."

"You weren't! Trust me... I felt it too! I thought surely you'd know that! I thought surely you'd know just by the way that I touched you!"

"I thought we both felt it... but when you left..." she hesitated... "If it really meant something, why did you leave?"

"I thought you wanted me to leave. I would have stayed had you asked."

She laughed slightly. "So this whole huge argument could've been avoided had we just been honest with each other, huh?"

He laughed back. "Yeah, I guess so!" After his laughter ceased, he looked into her eyes seriously, studying them carefully. "I love you, Caroline."

She smiled, drawing his mouth down to her parted lips. "I love you too, Richard." She kissed him gently, but passionately, her feelings for him expressed by the movement of her lips.

He pulled gently away for only a second... "You are my sincere amore..." he whispered... "I sincerely believe that." he added before bringing his lips back to hers.

They made love again that morning before heading downstairs to start their day...

"What happens now?" Richard asked softly as he looked over the panels to be colored...

"With us or with work?"

"Us."

"Well, what do you see happening?"

Richard sighed... "What I _see_ happening and what I _want_ to happen are two different things..."

Caroline smiled at his sarcasm... "What do you want to happen Richard?" she asked as she approached him...

"I want to start... well... dating you." he replied nervously. Why was he so nervous? He'd made love to Caroline three times already, yet he was nervous to talk about their relationship? Why? Because she now had all of his heart in her hand, whereas before, although his heart belonged to her, it was still in his hands.

"You are so cute when you're nervous..." she teased him... "I want that too." she added, kissing his lips softly...

"Really?"

She nodded, kissing him again... The smile that crossed his face immediately warmed Caroline's heart, and their sweet little kisses quickly turned passionate.

Just then, Annie walked in... "Hey, Caroline, wanna hit a movie today--" she stopped dead in her tracks when she saw her best friend and 'Mr. Frigid' locked together by lips and limbs.

Her abrupt entrance and crass voice drove the two lovers quickly apart...

"Don't you ever knock?" Richard snapped...

Annie just stood silently...

"Annie? Was there something you wanted?"

"Yeah, but... I think I have to go wake up first. I'm in the middle of a nightmare..." With that she turned around and walked out, leaving a smiling Caroline and an annoyed Richard...

"Don't worry, she'll warm up to you..." Caroline chuckled...

"Oh joy..." he quipped sarcastically... "Something to look forward to..."

"Well, you might not be looking forward to that..." she teased... "But I know something you _are_ looking forward to!" she added suggestively, and Richard cracked a smile as they continued where they left off.

THE END

   [1]: mailto:DancingQueen626
   [2]: mailto:JanaOnWheels



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